These days I’m pretty busy just living my life but I do take time everyday to reflect on where I came from and where I am now. Most days I am in awe of the life I lead today compared to even a couple of years ago. I’m here to tell you, if you doubt that you can flip your whole life upside down, inside out and survive it, that you absolutely can. And, in fact, you will be a much better, happier person for doing it. Your friends and family may fight you every inch of the way but at some point even they will admit that you are a better person now than you used to be. Will it be hard? Yes, of course. Everything worth doing is hard. Will it get worse before it gets better? Yep, most likely it will. Can you do it? I have no doubt.
Why am I so confident in you? Because I did it and I was just like you are right now. Scared, terrified even. Absolutely sure that I’d lose everyone and everything that meant anything to me. Convinced that I’d have to live in my car and eat food from the dollar store to survive. Afraid that no one would ever love me again and pretty sure that I’d never be taken seriously in my real gender. I was the kind of person that would say, “well, that’s ok for other people but not for me”. I have too much to lose. I’m too this, too that. Too old, too fat, too feminine looking, too dependent on my partner, too scared, too weak. I didn’t think it would be worth all of the turmoil I’d have to put myself and my family through. I was wrong. Very wrong.
I’m not telling you to transition. That’s your decision to make. But I want you to know that you can do it. You absolutely CAN do anything you want to do. I did it and so can you. I’m not special.
Actually, I am special. And so are you.
You see, people like us, the misfits and maladjusted freaks of society are the most amazing people. We’re superheros. We grow up being taught that who we are is wrong and we get beaten down into submission until we can’t take it any longer. I look at the general population now and I feel pity for them. They don’t know what it’s like to grow up the way we did and have to pull ourselves out of the abyss and rise above our upbringing. I am stronger than they will ever be because of what I’ve been through. They whine and moan about their aches and pains and every day worries while we’re out here reinventing ourselves into the superheroes we were born to be. Once you find your truth you are unstoppable. Take your truth where it leads you and don’t let fear stop you. Feel the fear but do it any way. Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Fear is a liar. You’re not weak or worthless. Quite the opposite. You’re one of the strongest people on the planet and you are special in ways others can’t even imagine. Whatever your deal is that makes you feel like a misfit, turn that shit around and make it your greatest strength. Think of all of the crap you’ve had to deal with in life because you’re not like all of the sheep in the world. You’re not a sheep. You’re a fucking lion. You’re a fucking superhero. All that crap has made you stronger and stronger. Your muscles are popping out every where from all the heavy lifting you’ve done in life. Now put it to good use and start living your wildest dreams. Be your own hero and I bet even the person closest to you that tells you this is crazy will thank you for it one day.